A Senior’s Lament


Thought I’d let my doctor check me ‘cause I didn’t feel quite right.
All those aches and pains annoyed me and I couldn’t sleep at night.

He could find no real disorder, but he wouldn’t let it rest.
What with Medicare and Blue Cross it wouldn’t hurt to do some tests.

To the hospital he sent me, though I didn’t feel that bad.
He arranged for them to give me every test that could be had.

I was fluoroscoped and cystoscoped, my aching frame displayed,
stripped upon an ice-cold table while my gizzards were x-rayed.

Doctors came to check me over, probed and pushed and poked around.
And to make sure I was living, they wired me for sound.

They have finally concluded — their results have filled a page
What I have some day will kill me, my affliction is “Old Age”!

— Mildred Merow

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Points To Ponder

Have you ever wondered ...
  • why you don't ever see the headline: "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
  • why "abbreviated" is such a long word?
  • why Doctors call what they do "practice"?

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