Cheap Home Security System

boots

1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.

2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine.

3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.

4. Leave a note on your door that reads as follows: "Bubba, Bertha, Duke, Slim, & I went for more ammo and beer. Be back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls; they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up bad. I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside til I get back. Cooter"



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Points To Ponder

Dog Logic
  • The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.
  • There is no psychiatrist in the world like a new puppy licking your face.
  • A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.
  • The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
  • Dogs love their friends& bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love & always have to mix love & hate.
  • Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.
  • If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise .

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