Natural Laws of the Universe

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The universe has many laws that help to keep things in motion. Here are a few that should not be overlooked:

"The Law of Volunteering"
If you are going to dance with a grizzly bear, you had better let him lead.

"The Law of Avoiding Oversell"
When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.

"The Law of Reality"
Never get into fights with ugly people. They have nothing to lose.

"The Law of Self Sacrifice"
When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last.

"Barnes' Law"
Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.

"Law of Probable Dispersal"
Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.

"Law of Volunteer Labour"
People are always available for work in the past tense.

"Conway's Law"
In any organization there is one person who knows what is going on. That person must be fired.

"Berg's Second Law"
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would have ultimately destroyed human civilization.

 
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I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape over the years, so I got my doctor's permission to join a local fitness club and start exercising. I decided to start small and take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for nearly an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.

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